Money Talks with Your Partner

In the prime of my youth, and at the height of my professional career, life was all good. And just when I thought things couldn’t get any better, I found that I was pregnant. After the baby was born, my partner convinced me to stop work, and stay home to take care of our son. We didn’t talk about whether his pay could support a family of three. We were in love, and our little bundle of joy completed our picture of domestic bliss.

Soon after, the cracks started to show. I would ask him for money for household expenses, and receive less with the expectation that we would manage, somehow. As time went on and this lifestyle became more difficult to maintain, it became clear to me that I was the “somehow”. I started using my savings to fill-in the gaps and when the well ran dry, I had to go back to work to help support our family, and look for extra money to cover the cost of house help and child care. Amid all these mounting frustrations and resentments, we never actually had any out-and-out discussions about money management. I held my tongue and endured, in order to keep the peace. Looking back on this time, I can see that we should have had money talks while we were still dating. We were obviously financially incompatible, and it would have been better to have known this before our lives became so permanently entangled.

We’re all feeling the pinch, are stressed out, and stretched to our limits. What little money we had in years prior, can barely sustain us this year, and it’s likely that things will continue to trend downward in coming years. Most of us are living in survival mode, operating on autopilot, and trying to get through each day while financial pressures continue to rise. Instead of sharing our struggles and frustrations with our partners, we bottle things up until they explode and destroy our relationships.

Yes, times are hard, but as a couple, you should choose your hard. Moving to a smaller house or cheaper neighbourhood is hard, but so is racking up debt in a bid to keep up appearances. Budgeting is hard, but so is living paycheck-to-paycheck. Building your savings and growing your investments is hard, but so is living in the real world with little-to-no money. Couples should openly talk about money – come up with a household budget, identify areas to cut expenses, set money goals, save, invest, and make important financial decisions – together.

By discussing finances, couples transform a common relationship stressor into a framework for lasting companionship, security, and a stronger future. Seeing as in-depth money talks set the tone for the future of your relationship, aren’t you long overdue?


Having money talks shouldn't feel like a police interrogation, or pulling teeth. Initiate these conversations from a place of fun, patience, curiosity, and understanding with Sente-Sana – order your game here.

If you're interested in watching full video essays of this and other topics discussed here, visit and subscribe to my YouTube channel.

Let's build your future, together.

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